Chivalry: What Women Want To Know But May Not Want To Hear
Accolade by Edmund Leighton (1901) Oil on Canvas
In this essay, I will define Chivalry with historical accuracy and include a litany of source material. I will answer why the chivalrous code has eroded over time and why we desperately need a renaissance of Chivalrous Men. I will also make strong statements likely to offend some women along the way.
In no way do my observations or opinions expressed herein pigeon hold my moral or ethical compass to the inclusion of one ideal from the exclusion of the other.
Black-and-white thinking is the psychological immaturity at the root of personal and, thus, societal division.
My words serve as the middle fulcrum in which your thoughts can anchor and safely swing from one side to the other, like the pendulum keeping time inside an antique grandfather clock.
The image above, The Accolade, is a finely detailed painting set in medieval times, showing a beautiful red-haired Queen knighting a young man.
The Knight is bowed at her feet in a position of obedience — a physical display of surrender. A juxtaposition between the might of a warrior kneeling to a Queen — a symbol greater than her human form.
As Queen, her office represents the living archetype of beauty, goodness, justice, nourishment, peace, and life itself— all the qualities worth fighting or dying for.
No Kings & No Queens.
I presuppose the reader who may agree with my essay, or someone who may be persuaded, is a person who wants an enduring relationship, real intimacy, preferably marriage, or an equivalent commitment bound by witnesses, ceremony, and the sacred exchange of spoken vows.
That’s right; we live in an era where 86% of all single adults either aren’t looking, are ambivalent to marriage, or have taken permanent residence in Hook-Up culture or celibacy.
As a specie, this should be more alarming than environmental or social justice causes.
If animals were showing this kind of alarming data, we would rally donors, launch campaigns, march the streets, and produce documentaries. We are too blind to notice — we are failing at our most fundamental biological imperative.
As women become more concrete, vigilant, and stalwart in their attitude toward what they genuinely want and advocate for, men may be inspired to do something about their dysfunction.
But until then, if men and women, in general, can party and have their cake, too, you can expect nothing to change except within a tiny margin of men and women willing to stand in the vast minority.
Whether you know it or not, what is being asked for is a revival of courtship — a renaissance of sorts — to bring the best of the old in with the new — Chivalry Reborn.
Why have men lost the Chivalrous Code?
There is a laundry list of things I could start rattling off. But there is one thing that has an affect on a man greater than any other influence. And please resist the trigger to jump on the defense as a women. Men are equally responsible for ourselves and for the influence we have on women too. I wrote an entire essay (here.) about my mistakes and how I and men need to level up in all areas of life, especially with women.
However, it vital for women to awaken to the power they innately hold over men. For no other reason than being a women.
“Even the most independent-minded erotic man becomes dependent on the judgment of a woman, and a serious woman, one who is looking not only for an attractive man but for one who will love her and protect her, maybe the best possible judge of man’s virtues and thus be regarded even by the most serious man as the supreme tribunal of his worth.” — Professor Leon Kass, Leading a Worthy Life (2017) pg. 83
Okay, hear me out. And reread the above quote until it sinks in, and hold that quote in your mind as you read on.
Women hold the key and the power for how a relationship unfolds, not men.
If all women see and speak to on public platform is men as threat and the very image of man becomes a threat to women who did not have a father figure to anchor their developing psychology. Add a boyfriend or husband who has a shadow and the woman struggles to find the line between what is acceptable misgivings and what is terminable abuse.
The distinction is clear but just how clear?
In contrast, if the only determinant for the modern woman is his charm, appearance, status, money, and how well she vibes or the number of drinks she has had before spreading her legs, then why then is she surprised if later he isn’t the chivalrous knight of her fantasies.
In society today, what incentive do men have to ascend their animalistic, primal nature if gaming women and acting the playboy gets them what they want without work, discipline, or restraint?
One of the critical evaluations done with children to determine their emotional maturity is the ability to understand the value of delayed gratification.
Four years for college, internships, the ten thousand hour rule to master a craft, and yet we culturally are like babies when it comes to long term relationships.
Now take the most potent symbol (a woman) to a heterosexual masculine man and offer up the prize (pu$$y) without working for it, emotional control, discipline, or Chivalrous conduct.
That’s playing with fire, and as a result, what we see in the dating game with men and women today is facto II psychopathy.
Many guys and girls who are dating are self-centered, goal-oriented, manipulative players or what is known as a situational psychopaths.
A sex or love addict who compulsively uses others for the narcissistic high-off relationship but lacks the empathy and emotional maturity to move beyond their child-like fantasies played out on actual humans.
Instead, these people idealize, devalue, and discard each other in the cruelest ways when the human doesn’t match their unrealistic internalized fantasy.
Essentially, that is what a sexual predator is. They can be great guys or girls, educated and financially stable but enter the modern dating game, and people play to slay — the antithesis to chivalry or the queen, the knights sworn to protect and honor.
And how do radical feminists respond? Like they always have, act like copycats — if Johnny can do it, so can we. No matter if what Johnny is doing is wrong or self-effacing in the first place.
The boss babes, victim movements, and female comedians join the childish reverie. Sarcasm, insults, shame-blame, and the illusion that somehow progress is being made. Two wrongs have never made a right.
Are we as a society so utterly drunk on our cultural narcissism we have dismissed the lessons learned from civilizations that fell to decadence, hedonism, and corruption, like Ancient Rome, the Byzantine Empire, the Tang Dynasty, or even Gotham City, or the Atlantean Empire?
Have we convinced ourselves in the name of pleasure that drinking the poison is good for us? You do not need to be a religious fanatic to see the societal cliff we are headed straight for.
Is the potential for momentary pleasure proportional to the pain and heartache of chronically breaking up relationships, homes, and children's minds and little hearts?
What if you could decrease the heartache and increase the pleasure simply by delayed gratification?
Chivalry is a Code Lived by Men. Motivated by Women. Both In Service of a Higher Power.
Firstly, if a woman wants a better relationship with a man, the first step is to do what women ask for from us. Women need to empathize. Women can’t do that if women still subconsciously love to hate and hate to love men.
And women can’t empathize with men if women can’t become curious about our emotional needs.
If a woman is too stuck in past resentment or if she is projecting a unprocessed father wound onto a man or men then she is blinded by her own internal distorted subconscious beliefs about her man or men.
Like the depicted Queen in the photo, a woman symbolically represents more than sex to every man's mind. CG Jung, the renowned psychologist, referred to this as the animus — the unconscious idealized feminine he holds in his subconscious.
This is where the power of what is meant by the words of Prof. Kass’ words in the above quote comes from — the animus. Women simply represents a force larger than life itself to men. And when women at large hold a anachronistic opinion about men the affect corrodes the internal mind of man.
We need women to ourselves like women need men to themselves.
Add the estimates that a man consciously thinks about sex every seven seconds — or 8,000 times in 16 waking hours to the subconscious animus he holds to the equation then you can begin the essential process of becoming curious about men.
This is not some optional switch that men can turn off by going to church or finding God. It is a biological wiring that is dominated by the hormonal masculinity of a man — contributing to confidence, ambition, passion, and masculinity that feminine women are deeply attracted to.
An emotionally mature man can harness those drives and not fall into temptation, and a Chivalrous code helps to guide his path.
When a man sees a woman, he is attracted to her, and she is a match to his inner animus, and this animus can be acquisitioned through his charm and a few drinks; simultaneously, this female has given up her symbolic power, and a man’s animus (female psychological ideal) falls from Queen, and she is reduced in her psychological power with men.
One of the many reasons why there is such an over-compensation of women projecting power in the workplace or on social media. She has to rely on the illusion of power and control instead of the embodiment of energy that arises from within her essence.
In other words, her “Goddess” visage dissolves in a man's internal psyche; therefore, she has lost her power internally and has to project externally-fame, materialism, success.
In other words, core elements of narcissism.
In psychology this is known as compensation: Overcompensation, characterized by grandiosity, a superiority goal, leads to striving for power, dominance, self-esteem, and self-devaluation.
Undercompensation, which includes a demand for help, victim-hood identity that leads to a lack of courage and a fear of life.
Antithetical to her desires for a long-term or life-long partnership, she demotivates him (the general populous of men) to move beyond Peter Pan in the endless pursuit of pleasure-seeking game-playing perpetually living in Never Never Land by offering access to her as a sex object. Instead, of a virtuous queen who power comes from within. A place inside of her. A place where only the qualified man may enter and touch her inner realm.
This is the alchemy of sex and grossly missing today.
Have men and women become so detached from reality, or are we at a point where the general population of women was not taught the power they innately possess over men?
The Trojan War was fought over Helen of Troy, lasting a decade: In the 14th or 15th century BCE. The War of the Sicilian Vespers, who fought to defend the honor of a Sicilian woman who was insulted by a French soldier: In 1282. The War of the Roses in 15th century England over the King upsetting the balance of power for marrying an ordinary girl.
Name one single incident since the beginning of time where women assembled to fight for a man's hand or defend his honor by going to wage war in her behalf.
Chivalry and a Woman's Beauty
Women need not do anything other than pose and post photos of themselves on Instagram, and men will flock to follow for no other reason than her superficial beauty but beauty without the Queen ideal is a fraud.
“Beauty adds to goodness and arrests the mind.” — Summa Theologica by Thomas Aquinas (1265–1274)
During Chivalrous times, a woman's beauty was idealized healthily. She symbolized more than superficiality and sex appeal.
Since the dawn of time, men, not all, but most, have been protectors of women. No amount of history slandering mockery of our shared roots will change the hearts of good men who want to serve, provide and protect women or the woman the vow to have and to hold in sickness and death.
Chivalry was one formalized example that taught men that virtues, not exploitation, anchored the power of a woman’s beauty.
Chivalry and the Modern Woman.
Men need women to hold their symbolic office and require more from us if women are willing to take the office of Queen instead of merely announcing you're a boss babe or a Goddess because they have managed to gain monetary success without a man or have burned some sage at a Goddess retreat.
Men have been attracted to feminine women since the beginning of time. It is naive to think that masculine men want only compliant, passive, submissive homemakers.
Side note: how would women feel if men hosted God retreats and announced on social media, “We are God’s” hosting God Circle? Would we not be laughed at, scorned, and stoned for grandiose narcissism?
Men (generally) are not attracted to a woman's success or sexual exploits— no more than women are aroused by getting random dick pics.
A man may respect a woman's position or status, but those qualities do not translate to what men are emotionally attracted to or need from the feminine.
The only person, a woman is impressing with boss babe vibes is herself and other women. Many of these women hide their wounds or insecurities behind narcissistic walls like a career or vanity to protect themselves from dealing with the pain they felt as little girls and an absent or abusive father.
Later, the men they date or marry become the psychological punching bag for their father-wound projections instead of virtuous protectors. And they see evil men everywhere or the men they date to confirm their subconscious core beliefs.
Men struggle to find their purpose in a modern woman's life. What does she need men for but sex, fun, and nights out?
Women, if you want Kingly, Chivalrous, loyal, honorable, virtuous men of impeccable excellence, then stop waiting on us to gather rank while you serve up sex at our whim, pretending this makes you powerful while masquerading as a boss babe and secretly hoping his immaturity will magically turn chivalrous while you ignore your immaturity.
Men, like women are smart. Especially when it comes to getting sex. Most successful, well-groomed, healthy, affluent men know that even the most well-healed, assertive boss babe buckles at the knees to the right parfum, a dash of charm and a sprinkle of humor—off to bed they go.
You, women, need to require more from men if you want a return of benevolent Chivalrous knights you can love, trust, respect, and sexually desire all your days.
To know your deep feminine, you need to know the masculine.
Look at men as an ally and not a threat through the lens of a broken childhood or a traumatic experience you have not dealt with.
Most adult males do not know where to begin to become Chivalrous and the emotional protectors you need to blossom in a relationship. Most adult males didn’t have fathers either.
They would quickly figure out how to become Chivalrous if they needed to get laid.
So who is waiting on who? Chicken or egg?
Help Us Instead of Shaming Us.
Finger pointing, slander, projection only incites a defense, a wall or a reaction. And I do not care how many stupid Hollywood movies or famous woman portray women as equal at going into battle by confrontation.
If there is one thing men have done well through the ages is wage war. So, to think by provoking men by trying to dominant men in a battle wits or force is unequivocal grandiosity or in other words, pathological narcissism.
There is a better way to melt the heart and motivate the minds of men if women need something more from men. A new skill.
Let’s evolve past this generalized liberalism and finger pointing.
Women, do you want to fast-track to new advent of healthy men and a return of Chivalrous men? Then starve us out! Stop giving up your pu$$y and demand more from yourself and the race of men. Try being soft, kind, and encouraging. Stop shaking your fist and shame-blaming men for our failures — those branches bear no fruit.
Stop believing the lie. The deceitful voice craving validation to join in “hate-speech light.”
From what I could tell, my ex-girlfriend had all the qualities I hoped for in a life partner.
Someone I was willing to dare to open my heart again. We slept together too soon based on her and her friend's account, and to be honest, I was too much our first night.
She thought she made a mistake and judged me as the type of guy looking for a sexual conquest. The doubt lingered in her mind and the crack grew with every infraction I made. I could do 20 things extraordinarily well but the only things she gave credence to was my mistakes.
That one doubt led to many doubts. No matter my valiant effort, my willingness to forgive her for her mistake or the good I did.
Doubts are pernicious like that — all they need is a crack.
The thing is, I would have waited to have sex with her from the night of our first date to the day I said I do if that’s what she needed to feel safe and loved.
But she had already told me a story on our first date that she broke up with her last boyfriend because he asked to stop have intercourse at some point out of wedlock. He was concerned he might lose his job at the church (don’t get me started on that).
I took note. I knew I needed to perform.
The pressure is real for us too. Plus, we have been crushed by women too. Ghosted, cheated on, falsely accused of things and the hurt is a pain we protect with defensiveness too.
It didn’t matter to me whether we had sex on the third date or on our Wedding night, but I didn’t get that chance. A year and a half later, I am still single, not dating.
I am loyal, honorable, sensitive, and remorseful. Plus, I have control over my sexual urges — Chivalrous conduct despite my mistakes. I am real man, flawed and shadowy but light persists through my darkness.
Men and women have to see how we have hurt each other, how our broken childhoods have effected us and make the conscious effort to grow together.
The Past Should Inform the Present.
Somehow we have gotten things all twisted up and have come to believe the present informs the past.
We take words like Patriarchy, first defined in the 16th and 17th centuries at the rise of Western Civilization.
Patriarchy in it’s first use in context meant the man is responsible or accountable for his wife and family.
It was an engendered term that carried weight and expectation to his duty in service of those entrusted to his care, much like Chivalry meant in the medieval eras.
Patriarchy was a term indicative of a mans responsibilities not a demonstrative label intended to generalize all men into oppressive tyrants.
The abuse of power and those that wield it are those who use force or manipulation to gain a selfish pleasure or advantage.
My birth qualifies me to reach for the sword in the stone, but only by my virtues, values and character will the stone chose me. Only when these qualities are apart of the boy is he worthy of carrying the sword as a Squire.
Only the hard won lessons earned by vigorous and disciplined training yield the competencies to be titled Knight.
Only then do my competencies tested in battle, the adversity of life and the lived demonstration of benevolence, justice, loyalty, honor, plus my victories combine into wisdom that earn the title of King.
Character/ Squire > Competencies/ Knight > Wisdom/ King
Character/ Maiden > Competencies/ Princess > Wisdom/ Queen
How selfish can we be as a society to think that somehow we are so all-knowing, so advanced that the ancient initiations no longer apply or we can bypass these essential time tested steps?
We can’t and we are all feeling the consequences.
With all of my study, adventures, and experiences with the small number of women I have known sexually, I will say this as plainly as I can:
Women, if you want a Chivalrous lifelong man. Stop having sex with us before you have required a demonstration of his maturity, the willingness to delay gratification, vetted his virtues and witnessed his humility and wisdom.
There is nothing old-fashioned about crafting a well-lived life of internal harmony.
This is the most effective way to eliminate confusion, emotional pain, and heartache.
Think about it; Most women take long defensive breaks of abstinence to “recover” from a breakup. Why not take that position offensively and forgo the break-up altogether?
There is no quicker, time-tested way to eliminate the predators, Dark Triads, Narcissists, and Psychopaths.
You earn a man’s Chivalry by requiring Chivalry. You do this by holding office, not playing house.
Women, you hold the key to the gateless gate. Close your legs, and you watch a world of men step into line and become the men you forgot to be.
Conquering women through sexual conquest becomes his quest since transcending his base nature in pursuit of a higher purpose like Chivalry is demotivated or, by today’s standard, Chivalry has been but nearly extinguished.
Chivalry and Trauma
The studies clearly show societies and individual mental health are statistically and significantly better when humans pair bond, have emotionally secure families, and raise children who learn by emulating the behaviors of their primary caregivers.
And it’s not all about childhood trauma being the reason for adult dysfunction.
We are the most neuroplastic (capable of changing our brains) when we are kids, which means the ability of the nervous system to change its activity in response to intrinsic or extrinsic stimuli by reorganizing its structure, functions, or connections after injuries (trauma).
In other words, trauma doesn’t have to stay with us. For example, if a traumatic event happens. Let’s say my arm is broken from falling out of a tree, I get thrown from my horse and knocked unconscious, or I witness a young boy tragically and gruesomely die before my eyes.
These highly traumatic events could have negatively affected my developing nervous system as a boy. Instead, because I was fortunate to have two emotionally secure parental bases when these events occurred, I developed an ability to self-regulate my nervous system.
Fear is an informative, emotional marker. Resilience is a state of being, and tragic circumstances are not unique (grandiosity) to anyone of us. Rather traumatic events are a prerequisite to living incarnate.
In other words, fear informs us of perceived danger, not always factual threat.
By encountering numerous varieties of circumstances that could be or are traumatic and facing accompanied by guiding principles or Values, we become well-adjusted humans capable of not only meeting the storms of life.
We become resilient and even anti-fragile — we become more robust, softer, and more empathetic through adversity vs. resentful, contemptuous, and bitter.
How does Chivalry have anything to do with trauma and anti-fragility?
An internalized code like Chivalry brings a man back to the center when the edges of his life are pushed.
Have we let ourselves slip back into prophecied age of lacaviousnous and debauchery found in the Yugas and Bible? Do we now prize jobs, money, and pleasure over purpose?
Have we all become sell-swords whereby our jobs and money have become our driving motivations wrapped in spiritual materialism, coaching courses, and endless nights out?
Begin Again.
Returning to the mores of old, we might start the over, correct course, and WILL our lives onto a path to creating a modern loving environment we desperately desire as friends, families, and spouses.
Chivalry is a decisive way of embodying guiding principles — once gallant acts represented in speech, deed, and courtliness toward women.
Today, once clearly understood and held in high esteem, chivalrous guiding principles have eroded into a milieu of confusing feel-good forces flanking and penetrating our minds from every conceivable source.
In this essay, I have documented with exacting detail the prominent effect Chivalry had over centuries, the scope and scale these principles were lived by men, and how deeply ingrained they were in society at large while challenging women to return to the queenly virtuous that inspire men to live and die for.
Below, I will show the voluminous body of texts that disseminate the importance of men living chivalrous lives. The specific emphasis on the treatment of women as the dominant ideal men lived by and died for across the centuries of an ancient era.
I can’t help to think Chivalry is a descendant of the Greek code of Areté — excellence in mind, body, and deed. However, unique to Chivalry is its specific instructions regarding the rules for respectful, honorable, and dutiful conduct toward women.
Chivalry is not outdated. Instead, Chivalry has been replaced by a culture eroding under our feet, and too preoccupied to notice the slow and steady regression into sanctioned oblivion.
History of Chivalry
Chivalry is a term that has its roots in medieval Europe and is often associated with knights, honor, and a code of conduct that governed their behavior.
Chivalry comes from the Old French word “chevalerie,” which means knighthood.
Chivalry was an essential part of medieval European society, and it influenced not only the actions of knights but also the behavior of ordinary people.
The origins of chivalry can be traced back to the 9th and 10th centuries in Europe when feudalism was the dominant system of governance.
In feudalism, knights were lords who provided military service to their monarchs in exchange for land and privileges.
These knights were expected to demonstrate courage, loyalty, and generosity, which were later incorporated into the code of chivalry.
What Was Chivalry
It was a set of moral and ethical guidelines that governed the behavior of knights and nobles, and it was seen as a way of maintaining order and upholding social values.
Chivalry emphasized the virtues of courage, loyalty, honor, and courtesy and emphasized protecting the weak and defenseless, including women and children.
Chivalry was primarily taught through knightly training, which began in childhood for young boys born into noble families.
These boys were sent to the castles of lords or knights, where they were trained in various skills, including sword fighting, jousting, horsemanship, and courtly behavior.
As part of their training, they were also taught the principles of chivalry and expected to adhere to them throughout their lives.
Chivalry was also an important principle or value taught in homes to young men.
Noble families often hired tutors or governesses to teach their children the principles of chivalry and good conduct.
Parents would also instill these values in their children through stories, myths, and legends, such as King Arthur's and his knights' tales.
Chivalry was an essential principle in medieval European society because it helped to promote social stability and order.
It provided a framework for ethical and moral behavior among the ruling classes and maintained a sense of order and discipline that permeated society.
Furthermore, chivalry also played a significant role in shaping the cultural values and norms of the time, which has had a lasting impact on Western culture until recent years.
The medieval code of chivalry was a set of moral and ethical guidelines that governed the behavior of knights and nobles in medieval Europe.
These knights were the superheroes of that time. Blazened into every household youth and mind, the epic tales told, and the character and qualities of these men are emulated from childhood until your dying day.
Although the specific details of the code varied depending on time and place, several general principles were commonly included. Here is a list of some of the most critical aspects of the code of chivalry:
The Chivalrous Code:
Honor: Knights were expected to be honorable and act with integrity in their dealings.
Courage: Knights were expected to be brave in battle and to stand up for what they believed in, even if it meant risking their own lives.
Courtesy: Knights were expected to be courteous and polite in their interactions with others.
Loyalty: Knights were expected to be loyal to their lords, country, and fellow knights.
Justice: Knights were expected to be fair and just in their dealings and defend the weak and defenseless.
Faith: Knights were expected to be faithful to God and the teachings of the Church.
Humility: Knights were expected to be humble and avoid arrogance or pride.
Self-sacrifice: Knights were expected to be willing to sacrifice their interests for the good of others.
Skill at arms: Knights were expected to be skilled in using weapons and to be able to defend themselves and others.
The Chivalrous Code Torward Women
The specific tenets of chivalrous behavior toward women were essential to the medieval code of chivalry.
Knights were expected to treat women with respect, honor, and courtesy, protect them from harm, and pay the ultimate sacrifice by laying down their lives to save the life and virtues of women. Here are some of the specific tenets of chivalrous behavior toward women:
Protection: Knights were expected to protect women from physical and emotional harm. This included defending them from violence and safeguarding their reputation and honor.
Respect: Knights were expected to treat women with respect and dignity, regardless of their social status or personal attributes.
Courtesy: Knights were expected to be courteous and polite in their interactions with women and to deny their personal wishes and preferences.
Romance: Knights were expected to be romantic and chivalrous in their relationships with women and to engage in courtly love, a form of idealized love that emphasized chivalric values such as loyalty, honor, and devotion before fleshly retreats.
Modesty: Knights were expected to be modest in their behavior toward women and to avoid excessive familiarity or intimacy. This kept the masculine and feminine polarity strong between the sexes, and men not overly saturating their women.
Chastity: Knights were expected to be chaste in their relationships with women and to avoid any behavior that might be seen as inappropriate or immoral.
Graciousness: Knights were expected to be gracious in their interactions with women and to show generosity and kindness toward them.
As chivalry evolved, it became increasingly associated with courtly love, a concept that emphasized the idealization of women and the pursuit of love as an ennobling experience.
Chivalry also became more complex and refined, incorporating elements of etiquette and refinement into its code of conduct.
Today, chivalry is often seen as outdated, and its influence is a dim light in modern society.
The ideals of honor, loyalty, and courage central to the code of chivalry continue to be valued, and the concept of chivalry is still invoked in discussions of ethics and morality.
Historical Texts Used to Chivalrous Behavior Toward Women
While the behavior of knights towards women was not always exemplary, there are specific written examples across centuries.
In the 12th-century epic poem “The Song of Roland,” the protagonist Roland is mortally wounded in battle and is dying. He requests that his sword, Durendal, be taken to Charlemagne’s court and placed in the hands of the Virgin Mary. This act of devotion to the Virgin Mary demonstrates chivalry towards women, as the Virgin Mary was seen as the embodiment of feminine purity and grace.
In the 14th-century “Book of the Order of Chivalry” by Ramon Llull, several passages emphasize the importance of chivalry towards women. For example, Llull writes that knights should always be respectful and courteous towards women and never use force against them.
The 15th-century romance “Sir Gawain and the Green Knight” features a scene in which Sir Gawain, the protagonist, is visited by a lady who tries to seduce him. Despite her advances, Sir Gawain remains faithful to his code of chivalry and refuses to succumb to her charms. This demonstrates the importance of chivalry towards women, even under challenging circumstances.
Baldassare Castiglione's 16th-century “Book of the Courtier” describes the ideal as being “courteous, modest, and gentle towards women.” The book emphasizes the importance of treating women with respect and dignity and is seen as an influential text in developing courtly behavior.
In the 13th-century “Lancelot-Grail” cycle, a collection of stories about King Arthur and his knights, there is a story in which Lancelot, the greatest knight of the realm, goes on a quest to rescue Queen Guinevere from a group of kidnappers. This act of chivalry towards the queen, seen as the embodiment of feminine virtue and beauty, demonstrates the importance of protecting and defending women in the code of chivalry.
In the 14th-century poem “The Book of Good Love” by Juan Ruiz, the protagonist falls in love with Lady Reason, who represents the ideal of feminine intelligence and wisdom. The poem celebrates the virtues of women and portrays them as deserving of respect and admiration.
In the 15th-century “Le Morte d’Arthur,” written by Sir Thomas Malory, there are several instances of chivalrous behavior towards women. For example, when Sir Galahad visits a castle, he is asked to choose between a sword and a horn. He selects the horn, and when he blows it, a group of maidens appears and tells him that he has passed a test of chivalry. This scene demonstrates the importance of treating women with respect and courtesy, even in situations that may seem trivial.
In the 16th-century “Orlando Furioso,” written by Ludovico Ariosto, the protagonist Orlando is deeply in love with a woman named Angelica. Although she does not return his affection, Orlando remains chivalrous towards her and treats her with respect and courtesy.
Chivalry: The Historical Progression Through Ages In Literature:
In Contrast, I couldn’t find written works on how to abuse or oppress women. Not that difficult things did not happen to women. Humans were brutal then; they are now in different ways of sorts. However, no matter how dark, there was a verifiable, very public, sanctioned effort to protect, honor and care for women.
Here are 1,100 years of Chivalry told in Books:
The Song of Roland (12th century)
The Code of Chivalry (13th century)
The Book of the Order of Chivalry (14th century)
The Knight of the Tower (15th century)
The Book of the Courtier (16th century)
Le Morte d’Arthur (16th century)
The Faerie Queene (16th century)
The Anatomy of Melancholy (17th century)
The History of the Knights Templar (18th century)
The Castle of Otranto (18th century)
Ivanhoe (19th century)
The Knight in History (19th century)
King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table (20th century)
Don Quixote (20th century)
The Once and Future King (20th century)
The Sword and the Grail (20th century)
Knights (21st century)
The Code of the Woosters (21st century)
Chivalry: A Very Short Introduction (21st Century)
The Chivalrous Society (21st century)
“Hear now the prayer of thy servant, who seeks thy guidance and wisdom in the governance of his kingdom. Grant me, O Lord, the wisdom to rule justly and fairly, to temper justice with mercy, and to be a true and faithful servant of thy holy will. Give me strength to resist the temptations of the flesh, the world, and the devil and to follow thy commandments in all things. And grant that I may be a good example to my people, leading them in righteousness and peace. This I ask in thy holy name. Amen.” — King Arthur
King Arthur’s Prayer, as written by Sir Thomas Malory’s “Le Morte d’Arthur,” in the late 15th century, around 1470 or 1485. Malory was a knight and an English writer.